Again and again....

    Crap..Crap..and Crap...why must happen to me? why I must stuck? and the first question that I should ask...Why am I questioning the same old craps? I thought I can get rid of this all craps long time ago by trying not to get involved... But there is no way I can I cannot get involved...learning by seeing...running is not the best choice to be consider right now..today i can run but one day i still have to face it...you might think i don't care..but i do care in my own way..I can say that I don't want to get involved but today I ignore a crap and then tomorrow I face the same crap with its 'interest rate'...what the hell...I'm not asking you to comfort me,but I also don't ask all the craps that you guys have done..all the things that you all had done..we are the one that have to carry the burden..you have shown me the 'price' for running from a CRAP..and thats the reason why I don't want to run from this crap..I think its better for me to grow up with this craps rather than face it on the future..i might get mad..sooner or later i still have to face it..it just the matter of time isn't it? there is saying that ' small problems have a bigger impact in the future '.."sikit-sikit lama-lama jadi bukit"...I don't want my future burdened by all this crap (as if all this crap will vanish from my life)...at least my future generation will have the less impact than I get now...i'm thinking that if i can't handle this crap now...eventually there is no way i can handle it in the future...i try to think that this all are simple to handle..it works for a moment cause when i start thinking about it again...it backs to the critical state..i wish its only because of my critical complicated thinking...but its really complicated crap...and i realize that all my critical and complicated thinking is because of these crap....again...i'm stranded in my complicated thinking and mind...all this crap is endless huh??after typing all this...now i can relax...my chest that about to burst just now is back to normal...


p/s : I always told my friends to find someone to talk if they got problems..but me myself feel more comfortable by interpret the feeling and ease it by writing..i guess i can only express it by writing not through talking..people are complicated isn't it?