♥♥Just about what I have gone through every day... So it will remind me of my life path up until now... I want to express it with words... My small brain can’t afford to keep it all... The language may 'Campur2' because it’s my diary after all... who will cares anyway??? XD♥♥

♥♥Life not always happen like you have planned.. Everyday there will be surprises happening in your life.. Treasure it.. Appreciate it.. It may not always happen.. And maybe will not happen again..♥♥


Daisypath Friendship tickers

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Who knows?

I know I crossed your mind..
Because you crossed my mind too..
I hope you happy there with the person that you love..
Your family, friends..
Time passed, memories left behind..
Those memories are part of my life and yours too..
Not that much, just a small tiny story life for you..
For me, its just can't be explained..
Best wishes to you..
If we ever meet again, I wouldn't know how I will react.
You come into my life like a gift..
You colors my everyday life like an artistic drawing..
Unexplainable, with the rhythm and intuitions..
Mystery and surprising..
You walk out from my life..
Suddenly and left me speechless..
Left me wondering with my own thought and reasoning..
I wouldn't say I regret that I met you..
And I wouldn't regret that we are apart..
As long as happiness evolving in our life..
All that already pass wouldn't really matters..

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Please Just Go AWAY!

I don't know when its started..
But I started to hate you..
That bringing stress to my heart NOW..
This is not a good sign, I'd never hate this way..
I don't like people, but not to the extent of hate!
You will never know cause I will never tell..
I should stay away from you and your kind..
-heart depressed-

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

One after another.. Issues arises. 
I haven't solved an issue and there it come, another issue. 
Be strong and cheer up! 
All these will end soon. 
Gambatte!

IGNORE THIS! SERIOUSLY!

     Seriously I really feel missing now. Missing . And I don't know who or what I'm missing now. Restraining myself shedding any tears now. I feel I have nothing or no one right now. Emotional? Just let me be, I need this. To ease my heart burden.
     I miss the beautiful moments in my life. The people that means a lot to me. I miss the people that I used to clinging to. The people that listen to all my words that are quite nonsense but they will comfort me. Best friend? Friend forever? I have lot of friend, tons of it, and I know my enemy or people that doesn't like or hate me are more out there. I have lot of good friends and great friends.
    I used to have one, the BEST, where we can call each other when we are in trouble or need accompany to talk. But now its only in our memories. We do almost everything together. Together we are being scold, being look down, doing crazy things, have a heart to heart talk and many more! Thanks to you, I become myself now. We have not contacting each other for a long time now. --
    You guys are older than me, no matter what others say about you guys, I respect all of you! You guys are apart of my life during the important moment in my life. You guys had opened my views wider than it was and protected me. I just hope all of you will be happy with your family. There are no words that I can describe you guys here. -,,
    You two have been a very good friend(nearly best) to me since secondary school and I don't know what happened to us when we finished our secondary school. We didn't close like we used to be. One of you already married and have 2children, may God bless you and your family. And another one is happy with her life with sweet family and boyfriend. May God bless you too friend. I just want to tell you guys, I love and miss both of you! -,-
    After entering Matriculation, I am close with you guys. Its a very short moment, but leave deep impression in me. Miss you guys. -,,,-
    My girls! you guys have been the star of my life! The moment I'm with you all are all beautiful moments! We are still in touch and close but I'm really sorry, I just can't forget the past. You guys have been very great friend to me, cheer me up and support each other. You guys are the best among the the greatest! We laugh together, share stories, have fun..... I can find myself sad when I'm with all of you and yes thats why we lack. I never let you guys see my worse state. I just can't do it. But I really love and miss you guys! --
     Okay, one more person that I cling most! You know who you are if you really know me. We are not close when we first met. Just thinking that you had been so cruel to me huh? But as time pass by, the chemistry and bonds are closer and closer. Distance that are just a space that can't make the bond break easily. I miss you! Will go to meet you soon! By the way, be happy there with him. Tell me if he bully you, no excuse, revenge will be executed!


P/S: OMG, why I feel like I clinging too much? This is too much. So deep! and scary! I should shift away those clinging feeling to other things. S***! I think this is the effect of last night movie! R.A. told you to not saying anything nonsense!! I don't want to become Rebecca Evans! Warghhhh! My room mate, don't be scared k? Hahaha.. Rather than scaring my room mate, I feel scared for myself! Enough with those emotional melancholy! I will become mad woman if continuous like this. As for someone, what you said to me starting to make sense! OMG! This would be the scariest truth I've ever known and realized! I need to reflect myself back! This is not the truth! This year sure I have know thing that I didn't realize back then! And its really BIG THING! I just hope this is not true! I need to reflect myself back. *SLAP IN THE FACE*

Monday, April 25, 2011

My New Obsession!

     Obsession towards? Korean group called Epik High! How and why I become obsessed to this Korean group? To be honest ( as far as I Think I'm being honest! ), I'd never liked Korean group this much! Maybe I like some song from Korean singer or group and it will not exceed 2 or 3songs! I easily become tired of them! In my opinion, this group are so awesome, I like them very much. It was fated meet when I just randomly google search Korean song, for variety of music in other language. :p Epik High was listed as top Korean group, so I listen to few of its song and all the song just amazed and make me dissolve into their music! I just love their music and songs! Okay, now I want to share about this group.XD


-picture credit to Google-




     Epik High is a hip hop group from South Korea, composed of three members - Tablo, Mithra Jin, and DJ Tukutz. All three members of Epik High can sing, write lyrics, and compose and arrange music. Their music has been known to be a "lyrical piece of literature" and "urban poetry", lyric orientated, soulful and often witty while addressing serious social issues such as identity, discrimination, community, unity and change as a whole. 
-picture credit to Google-



     Epik High was relatively unknown to Koreans in the beginning of its career due to hip-hop music's lack of popularity in Korea. Their success began with the release of their second album, titled "High Society". Upon the success of their third album, "Swan Songs", released in late 2005, Epik High has become one of the most popular hip-hop figures in Korea. Their fourth album, "Remapping the Human Soul", released in early 2007 has shown a very different music style from their previous albums, with the members deciding to head towards a 'no genre, just music' style. Their fifth album entitled "Pieces, Part One" was released in April of 2008. The album was leaked over the internet, however, this did not impede the success of the album when it was released.


Members profile:


-picture credit to Google-



TABLO

Also known as: Daniel Armand Lee
Birth name: Lee Sun-Woong (이선웅)
Birth date: July 22, 1980
Education: Bachelor's Degree in English Literature and Master's Degree in Creative Writing (Stanford University)
Hobbies: Listening to music, watching movies & reading books
Favorite musicians: Marvin Gaye, Nas, Loveholic, Nell & Kim Tae-woo



*Tablo was a big Hip-Hop fan ever since he could remember, listening to old Run-DMC and Cold Crush tapes and always rhyming around the way in South Korea. But there was one emcee who inspired him to take it seriously. After he heard Drunken Tiger rapping, he became part of a group called Epik High in 2000 and also claimed to be the first emcee to invent the rhyming rifle. In the fickle world of Hip-Hop, Tablo kept his name alive over the years by doing shows and various cameos with the EPMD.
"Verbally intelligent" -Drunken Tiger-



-picture credit to Google-


MITHRA JIN
Real name: Choi Jin (최진)
Birth date: January 6, 1983
Education: High school diploma (Gwangmyung High School)
Hobbies: Movies, music & computer games
Favorite musicians: Rakim, Cunninlynguists, Kim Beom-soo & Hweesung




*The mighty Mithra Jin, a.k.a. Choi Jin, was originally a poet whose poems also worked as rhymes. Park emceeing and poetry readings were the first places where he met his future partner Tablo. They were introduced by a mutual friend and clicked right away because each other's style of poetic rhymes was comparable.
"I'm capable of anything. Anything on the face of this planet, I'm capable of. And I know that. That's the dangerous thing about me, 'cause I know it. And by knowing it...I'll do it. Just to show that...yes, somebody out there got enough balls to do it" -Mithra Jin- 



-picture credit to Google-


DJ TUKUTZ
Real name: Kim Jeong-sik (김정식)
Birth date: November 19, 1981
Education: Unknown degree (Donga Broadcasting College)
Hobbies: Listening to old music, movies & web surfing
Favorite musicians: Dilated Peoples, D-Styles, Primo & Triple Threat DJs



*First got into DJ-ing in the summer of 1995 while spending his time at illegal raves and warehouse parties, where his passion for the scene and music began. He started playing at local raves and parties in Japan's underground Hip-Hop scene, before moving up to South Korea in 2000 to attend the Technics DJ School. After returning from the academy, he hooked up with Tablo and headed to the states. He worked and DJ-ed on radio shows, live events and clubs around the Boston and NYC area. 
"Turntablist 4 L.I.F.E." -DJ Tukutz- 


-picture credit to Google-


     Their song! There's a lot of it! My favorites songs are:
  1. Love Love Love 
  2. 1Minute 1Second
  3. Paris 
  4. Fly
  5. Fool
  6. One
  7. Umbrella
  8. Girl
  9. Girl Rock
  10. (about to discover more!)

P/S: the purpose of writing this post is to keep me awake! I have to study! By the way, Saranghae Epik High! XD

A Guide To Guy Talk

     Huhuhu, previous post is about girl talk real meaning, today I will post about guide to guy talk... This article was written by Jonathan Small. Jonathan Small is a freelance journalist based in Los Angeles and coauthor of the book Best Places to Kiss in Southern California. As far as I remember, they say guys seldom speak, and when they speak, they really meant it. Well I guess that can't be used anymore since there's a lot of guys are talkative and yes guys don't always mean the things that they said. This is said by Scott Haltzman, M.D., a clinical assistant professor of psychiatry and human behavior at Brown University and author of The Secrets of Happily Married Men.


     This one is for girl to understand more about guy words. But I didn't say its 100% true. Up to some points, you have your own understanding about the meaning. 


This article was taken from: What He Really Means



What he says: 
“We should hang out some time.”

What he means: 

“I don’t want to flat-out ask you on a date and risk rejection, so first I’m going to gauge your interest.”

Why he says it: “This is the safest way to go,” says Ron Karmel. “If she says ‘yeah’ and gives you her number, you know you’re in, but if she just says ‘yeah’ and does nothing — you know it’s a no-go.” And with the male ego the way it is, this is the preferred way for him to find out. Says Haltzman, “It hurts to be rejected, so asking a woman out this way gives her a chance to pull away without the guy being embarrassingly turned down.”





What he says: 
“I really like your shoes.”

What he means: 

“I really like you.”

Why he says it: Granted, he could genuinely like your shoes. But if he says this during the early stages of dating, it also likely means he’s physically attracted to you — but doesn’t want to come right out and say it and seem like a dog. Ty Marciniak claims that this is one of the first things he says when he’s into a girl. “It boosts her confidence, but it also shows her I’m fashionable and sweet,” he says. “She’ll notice that I didn’t come right out and compliment her legs or something.” Which is, of course, what he really was complimenting in the first place. Get it?


What he says:
“Maybe we should take some time off from each other — you know, take a break.”

What he means:

“Maybe I’m better off keeping my options open.”

Why he says it: Seems harsh, but it’s common: “This kind of statement is driven by the man’s fear of hurting the woman or by wanting to have it both ways — having her without committing,” explains Alon Gratch, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist and author of If Men Could Talk. Problem is, women often take “the break” at face value. Trust me, if a guy is crazy about you, he’ll want to spend as much time with you as possible, period.


What he says:
“I am listening!”

What he means:

“I’m listening, but I really don’t want to get into a long, emotional discussion right now.”

Why he says it: When a guy zones out, women generally interpret that to mean he’s shut her off. More likely he’s just overwhelmed. “Men process verbal information better when it’s direct and to the point,” says Haltzman. Scott Borchert agrees. “When I say this, it usually means I just wish she’d get to the point sooner,” he says. One way around this is to ask him for his advice — guys love to fix problems — or to make sure he’s primed for a marathon talk session. So rather than launching right in, say, “This story’s kind of involved — can you listen now or should we talk later?”


What he says:
“You’re just too good for me.”

What he means:

“I need out of this relationship.”

Why he says it: “I’ve said that many times, but not once have I meant it,” admits Ron. “What I meant was I needed an out in the relationship, but I wanted to make her feel good about it.” Another popular alternative to this is the, “You deserve someone better than me” line. So why can’t guys just come out and tell you the truth? Unless you’re new to the planet Earth, you may have noticed men aren’t big on having talks — particularly breakup talks. In fact, they’ll say anything to avoid them, such as buttering you up so you don’t chew them out. “Men don’t go to places they’re afraid of,” says Gratch. “We don’t like to go where we might have to open up about feelings.” Did he just say feelings? Blech!


What he says:
“I think I’m falling in love with you.”

What he means:

“I am this close to saying the L-word, but I can’t bring myself to say it just yet and when I do say it, I want to be sure you’ll say it back.”

Why he says it: Ron calls this an “in-between line” — it’s a warm-up act to “I love you,” and it tests the waters to see if she’s feeling the same way. For women, talking about your emotions and exposing your vulnerabilities is a way to bond with another person, “but men don’t view exposing your vulnerabilities as a positive,” says Haltzman. “They don’t want to appear weak.” That’s why words like “thinking” and “falling” come in very handy — they give him an out. But they also allow him to express something meaningful in a way only he understands. Hopefully, now you will, too. 



P/S: This is just a guide to share, the level of reliability are unknown. To all the guys out there, what do you think about this? Is this are true? And for the girls, I stress it one more time, its just a guide. Be remind that, not everyone are behaving like that. :D

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Royal Top List

    Okay, I'm bored. So again, I browse through the internet to search something information to satisfy my curiosity? (skema gila ayat itu). Impact from the royal wedding huh? So this is what I got here, the top list of royal female and female. Just for fun..:D

     For your information again, this survey is conducted by beautifulpeople.com and I get this result from here :http://www.beautifulpeople.com/microsites/royal/result.aspx

Top 10 most beautiful Royal women
1. Princess Grace of Monarco (Grace Kelly)
2. Queen Rania of Jordan
3. Catherine Middleton (Kate Middleton) - or now it was Princess Catherine of Wales?
4. Princess Diana of Wales
5. Princess Charlotte of Monaco
6. Princess Gayatri Devi
7. Princess Madeline of Sweden
8. Crown Princess Mary of Denmark
9. Princess Margaret
10. Princess Masako of Japan

Top 10 most beautiful(erk) Royal men
1. Prince Carl Philip of Sweden
2. Prince Andrea of Monaco
3. Prince Frederick of Denmark
4. Prince Harry of Wales
5. Prince William of Wales
6. Prince Philippos of Greece
7. Felipe de Borbon, Crown Prince of Spain
8. Prince Guillaume of Luxembourg
9. Prince Albert of Monaco
10. Prince Charles of Wales



P/S: Okay, the Prince form Wales are dominating the chart huh? And not forgotten the Princess there. By the way, Prince Carl Philip is handsome, not beautiful..:p

Sedari Dulu by Geisha

ku hanya terdiam saat kau biarkan
semua kenyataan kau hancurkan dan menghilang
apa kau lupakan keras kau katakan
mencintai aku dan tak kau tinggalkan

apa kau fikirkan perih ku rasakan
tega kau biarkan semua kenangan menghilang
ku takut terbayang tak sanggup lupakan
hilangkan segala yang telah ku rasakan

reff:
mungkin sedari dulu ku tlah memikirkanmu
jauh dari hidupku ku simpan cinta yang tlah layu
sedari dulu ku mimpikan wajahmu
kembali di pelukku jalani semua seperti dulu

apa kau fikirkan perih ku rasakan
tega kau biarkan semua kenangan menghilang
ku takut terbayang tak sanggup lupakan
hilangkan segala yang telah ku rasakan

reff:
mungkin sedari dulu ku tlah memikirkanmu
jauh dari hidupku ku simpan cinta yang tlah layu
sedari dulu ku mimpikan wajahmu
kembali di pelukku jalani semua seperti dulu

mungkin sedari dulu (ku tlah memikirkanmu
jauh dari hidupku) ku simpan cinta yang tlah layu
sedari dulu (ku mimpikan wajahmu)
kembali di pelukku jalani semua seperti dulu



P/S: Somehow this song sounds very sad.. But I love the voice of the singer. XD

A Guide To Girl Talk

     Its been 3days since exam started. I mean the USM second semester examination off course. And I had completed 3 paper. Another 3paper to go girl! Kill or get killed! hahaha.. Whatever anyway. I will not talk any longer bout exam, please? hahaha. Okay, back to our topic!


 -A Guide To Girl Talk-

     I got this while browsing internet. The title is so interesting so I couldn't help myself to click and read it. So let me share this.:p A Guide To Girl Talk was written by Amy Spencer, Amy Spencer writes for Glamour, Cosmopolitan and Real Simple, among other publications, and currently doles out relationship advice to men every week on SIRIUS Satellite Radio’s Maxim channel.  (who is she? I don't know either! haha) for guys. This is written to let the guys understand what is the actual meaning when the girl say something. As a girl, I find it was really interesting. To understand my 'species' better? Lets check it out!

I take this info from this site: For guys: A guide to girl talk


What she says: 
“You’re really sweet, but I have a boyfriend.”


What she means: 
“You’re really sweet, but I definitely don’t want to date you.”

Why she says it: It’s a classic weekend night scene, somewhere in public. You see her sitting by herself and figure it’s as good a time as any to make a move. And it’s all going so well — she’s smiling, she’s answering your questions — until she drops the bomb that she has a boyfriend. Now, she may be telling the truth. But more likely this “boyfriend” is merely a ploy to get you to back off fast. “I use that line all the time; it really works without hurting a guy’s feelings too much,” says Claire McKimmie. “It shows immediately that there’s nothing more to say.”




What she says: 
“Why don’t I take your number and I’ll call you?”

What she means: 

“There’s no way I’m giving you my number, so why don’t I take yours?”

Why she says it: Even in this day and age, most women like to be pursued, so if we really like you, we’ll happily hand over our digits and wait for you to call. Pretty much the only time we’ll ask for your number is — sorry — when we want to keep the ball in our court and, well, never see you again. Other not-so-great responses: “Why don’t you email me instead,” “You can get my number through our mutual friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend Marcy” or “I’m listed.” Trust us, if she likes you, she’ll make it easy for you to call. 




What she says: 
“Oh, sorry, I already have weekend plans.” 

What she means: 

“I don’t necessarily have weekend plans, but you’re calling so last-minute I’d feel like a loser if I admitted I was free and took you up on your offer.”

Why she says it: As much as we all say that The Rules is an outdated tome that brews trouble between the genders, there are still some things we can’t let go of. And one of them is that we don’t want to accept plans with you last-minute, because we don’t want you to think we’re that easy to catch. “If a guy waits until Friday to ask me out on Saturday, I’ll probably say no,” says Claire Arnaud. “He has to work for it. And if he doesn’t have the patience to call back next week, too bad, that’s his loss.” 


What she says:
 “This feels good, but we really shouldn’t.” 

What she means: 

“I want you, bad, but don’t want to get burned.”

Why she says it: The night is winding down, and it’s time to decide whether she should hold ‘em, fold ‘em, or soldier on into the morning light with you. So if your date isn’t telling you a flat-out “No,” “I don’t want to,” or “I don’t like you that way,” chances are she really does like you — and want you — that way. She’d just rather wait a few weeks or months until she knows you’re not a love-’em-and-leave-’em type. “It’s possible she’s been in the position before of becoming intimate with a man and wanting to hear from him and then not hearing from him — and she doesn’t want to make that mistake again,” says Wolf. So if you’re a guy who really does want the relationship to go further (be honest now), it’s worth telling her so to see if she’ll change her mind.


What she says: 
“So, what have you been up to?”

What she means:

“Why haven’t you called me? Are you seeing someone else?”

Why she says it: If we haven’t talked to you in a few weeks and then you suddenly start calling again, all we want to know is, What the heck took you so long? But because we want you to think we’re laid-back “Hey, whatever” women, all we dare squeeze out is a general inquiry. “I don’t want him to know I care,” says Emilie Giroud Capet. Our biggest fear? That you’ve been calling other women instead of us. Whether that’s the case or not, you’re best off filling in your missing weeks with very unromantic things. “I’m hoping he’ll tell me he’s been working really hard,” says Emilie, “or better, that he’s been really sick.” 


What she says:

 “If you want to have a guy’s night, go ahead, fine.”

What she means: 

“I really, really don’t want you to go. And if you do, I’m going to be upset.”

Why she says it: It seemed innocuous enough; you asked her if she’d mind rescheduling your romantic night in so you could go out with the guys. She’s given you the green light. So what’s the red flag in that statement? The word “fine.” See, when a woman says something is fine, it’s decidedly not. “A woman will say it’s fine for him to go without her because she doesn’t want to get in a fight about it, even though deep down, she doesn’t want him to go without her,” says Wolf. Another phrase women often use to clue you into their displeasure: “If you like.” As in, “Sure, you can go out with the guys tonight, if you like.” That’s a pretty clear sign that while you may like it, she sure won’t. Either way, feel free to play dumb and go out with your buddies — just be ready to accept the consequences when you return. 



What she says: 
“So, tell me about Diane.”

What she means: 

“Should I be threatened by Diane?”

Why she says it: When a man brings up another female’s name in the midst of a story, a woman’s internal panic button is pressed — she fears that you’re talking about her because you’re secretly attracted to her. So until you make it clear you wouldn’t touch Diane with a ten-foot pole, our insecurities will lead us to assume she’s a wasp-waisted blonde who laughs at your jokes — and you’d love to be her boyfriend. So if Diane is attractive and available, please don’t say, “She’s really cool.” Instead, try, “Diane’s just someone I work with. Wow, she can be annoying sometimes. Some guys at the office are drawn to her but I don’t get it; she’s not all that.” 


What she says: 
“I love the way you smell.”

What she means: 

“I love you, but I don’t dare tell you I love you before you tell me you love me.”

Why she says it: “I just told the guy I’ve been dating for three weeks that I loved the way he smelled,” says Lili De Monseignat, “but it’s more him that I love than his smell.” Then why hold back? Because women know that telling a guy we love him before he tells us could be too much for him to handle. “It’s too soon to tell him I love him, because he’ll freak out and run away!” says Lili. But if you want to be loved, perk your ears up for the word itself. “I love your dog,” “I love your apartment,” “I love the way you dress,” and “I love that you love Indian food” are all signs that something big is bubbling underneath that little heart of hers. In other words, gentlemen, please be gentle. 





P/S: I'm not sure if this really true (aren't you a girl? shut up! hahahaha) but maybe true in some sense. For girls out there, is it like that? And for guys, maybe this can help you out in some sense. hahahaha. 

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Kenapa Singgah Kalau Tak Masuk

Kenapa Singgah Kalau Tak Masuk by Flava


Jarang sekali terdengar bunyi
Ketukan di pintu hatiku ini
Kalau ada pun bila ku buka
Tiada siapa yang berada di luar

Tapi sejak dua menjak kini
Ku merasakan bagai ada tetamu
Tanpa dijemput sudi menjenguk
Pada waktu sepi menemaniku

chorus
Tidak mungkin tiada di sini
Kerna tiada siapa pernah kisah
Akan aku tertanya ku siapa kamu
Kenapa singgah kalau tak masuk
Ke dalam hatiku



Jarang sekali ku rasa rindu
Menantikan waktu untuk bertemu
Bisakah bersua walau seminit
Agar lahir peluang berterima kasih

chorus

Jarang sekali ku sebegini
Mengharapkan hati untuk diselami
Jangan biar fikiranku buntu
Memikirkan mimpi dalam jagaku



P/S: this song is awesome! TERjumpa while browsing through some malay songs. I'd known this song long ago, just that TERlupa awhile...:p

Overloaded


     Ya, just like the title above. I feel that I'm overloaded now! This can't be continuous feeling. Its a serious problem! Just like I had always mentioned, my moods have a BIG impact on my study mode. Its not that I feel sad, down or whatever, it just that I feel not motivated to study right now. Its quite scary because I have exam on Monday morning and 2 paper on Tuesday! And honestly speaking, all the 3 paper, not even one I have completed study. Thinking that today is already Saturday!


    I think I need some STRESS to be inspired to revise now. I mean positive stress. Stress often push people to their limit, force out the inner self, be more cautious, etc. Which for me actually not so bad (if it is slight stress). And thats also explain why I do things more efficiently in the last minute? I mean the assignments. Not the last minute that tomorrow need to submit and today just start to do (well, I think I have faced the situation before, LOL) Okay, drop out the crap! :p

     To ease this 'unknown' feeling, I decided to pour some words here. (actually this feeling is better than the usual symptom that I face before) Previously, I will feel like I was facing MAJOR DISTURBANCE of feelings. Feeling rebellious to the max and super conflict inside. Now its only a 'lost of feelings', or I can say that I feel like NOTHING. Its not a bad feeling, its just the timing is not correct! 

P/S: aigoooo... what am I talking about here? it seems that I become confused about the things I write. stop this. yeah, I really mean it ESTHER, STOP IT! 

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

One night at Salim Restaurant

 Reminisce back 5years ago...

     While I was sitting at Salim at Lintas, KK with some friends... And also my Ex family that time with Bandi Amuk (yeah, I really mean Bandi Amuk the rock singer)... I was sleepy already during that time and they are still chit chatting... So bored and I'm not so interested to bother about them... Well, I have to behave myself during that time.. So the usual hyper me are in 'hibernating' mode. My heart are eager to fly away from there to join my friends that are laughing, joking freely at my back. So awkward when I have to behave myself and become quiet person at LINTAS, KK. I repeat LINTAS, KK. ;( (for those who are not from KK, just ignore my emphasize on LINTAS)

     I turned my back and saw my friends are leaving to their next destination.. I want to join! But in your dream la with your boyfriend family there.. Digging own graveyard? hahaha.. During this time, something catches my attention. Someone is smiling at me! yeah, seriously! I tried to look at my surrounding if the person is smiling to other people but there is no one. I look at the person in a blur face. (I look very stupid, silly in my blur face owkay!) Then I turn away my face since I feel that the person face looks very familiar. But not making it obvious to my boyfriend because he is the jealousy type. (mau perang dunia meletus?huh!) Then suddenly Bandi Amuk say something and tell us to look at the direction he point. I join them and he is pointing at the earlier guy! And he said something that make my heart almost burst! Its Anuar Zain! (no wonder earlier I think this guy is so familiar! despite on his good looking...hahahha)

     Bandi call him and he walk towards our table! And? Standing exactly at my back! arghhhhhhhhhh.... Oh mo! I think I can faint that time! But I think that is so unnecessary, this chance not coming easily to life..:D His song that famous during that time, Semua Untukmu automatically played in my head and heart. (cheh, feeling lebih2 la pla...) And we take picture together! Well, I'm quite ashamed that I didn't recognize him earlier. STUPID! I'm glad he smiled to me and take picture with me. He is very nice person and if given the chance to meet him again, I want to have a chat with him. He is one of the Malaysian singer that I really like! His style, his voice, his smile. Gosh! I think I had this crush on him since I know him from his 'Keabadian Cinta' song..:p

That was one of the most unforgettable night in my life....


Maybe you already forgotten about me, well there is no reason to remember either...hahhah
I just want to tell you that....

I adore you!
I adore you!
Yes! I would say it over and over again!
ANUAR ZAIN!
I've been his fan since secondary school I guess?
His voice are very soothing and his songs also calming...
His singing expression... Well lot alike with his sister, Ziana Zain..
They always feel their song when they are singing..
Showed through expression huh?
There are only few song that he sing but these songs are really superb!
You are still not married right?(grinning)
hahaha... No matter what other people thought of you, I will always support you!
Keep singing! 
If I had the opportunity, I would like to know you better..
I mean as a friend.. :D (request melampau~hahaha)

Owkay! Now I will attach one of his latest song..
This song is the soundtrack of Hikayat Merong Mahawangsa (haven't watch yet ;( )

Sedetik Lebih by Anuar Zain

Setiap nafas yang dihembus
Setiap degupan jantung
Aku selalu memikirkanmu
Dalam sedar dibuai angan
Dalam tidur dan khayalan
Aku selalu memikirkanmu
Ternyata ku perlukan cinta dari dirimu sayang
Barulah terasa ku bernyawa
Kasihku…ku amat mencintai kamu
Kerana kau beri erti hidup
Ku kan terus mencinta sedetik lebih selepas selamanya
Di kala penuh ketakutan dengan badai kehidupan
Ku bersyukur adanya kamu
Biarlah kehilangan semua yang dimiliki di dunia
Asal masih adanya kamu

P/S: One of my senior look like him, but sorry to say SENIOR, he is far far more adorable! hahahah.. And there are one actor that look like him also..Name? Don't know! hahaha..:p

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Happy Anniversary!


Yeah! Its been 1year 1month 1week and 1day we have been together! Its been so much fun being with you. Thanks for always be there for me. Make me feel better when I feel down, entertain me when I feel bored. I love spending my time with you. Thanks for bear with my thoughts all this time. I can't promise that I will be forever with you but I will do my best to appreciate the time we are together. I hope we will always be together and never be apart. You always make me happy every time I'm with you. Being with you make me too absorbed and I just can't resist you. Happy anniversary to us My Diary! :D


P/S: well, I'd wished that I can wish something like this to the person that I love on our anniversary. Maybe better than this because it is for human! It can involve lots of emotions and feelings.

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Kem Pemantapan Kendiri dan Kepimpinan SRN

      I went to this camp on 4th of April, Monday and just back on 7th of April, Thursday. To be exact, I reached my room at 8th of April, Friday. This camp was held by SRN(Sekretariat Rukun Negara) UMT with JPNIN(Jabatan Perpaduan Negara dan Integriti Nasional). This program require one university to sent 8 students to represent their university.From USM:

  1. Ina
  2. Vun
  3. Fara
  4. Irnie
  5. Bio
  6. Lan
  7. Wan
  8. (me)

      Overall, the camp was awesome! This is real! Well, that doesn't including the fact that we cant use any toiletries other than tooth paste! Survive 3 days 2 nights without soap, shampoo, deodorant, sun block, face wash, etc. But I know some of the participant didn't abide the rules. Although I quite a riot, I follow the rules SOMETIMES. Just some small rules. I have to work harder and emphasize more on PUNCTUALITY. Ashamed to admit? Well, truth will be exposed anyway. Keep denying it and you will look stupid when all comes out.

Back to the camp please.....

Okay, the tentative of the whole journey.

4th April 2011
- From USM to UMT, what a long journey! I think I've never ride a car that long! We do stop in few places, but still it was very LONG journey for me. (sakit pinggang, sakit badan to the max!)






5th April 2011
-Reached UMT around 12.30am. Yeah! (gembira sakan sampai wooooo) Then we check in to the hostel and went out to have some drinks.









-Well, I think we are the last group that got into the bus. Very punctual huh? And there almost commotion that morning because of Vun got angry and annoyed with the situation. Can't deny it, some of it was very annoying but have to remain cool..:p














-Goes to Bidong Island by boat/ferry (whatever!) quite a long journey...:D

-Reach the island and yeah, USM is the most happening group! Well, because? Just reached there and we only do like we are on vacation plus we are playing funny games and laugh like fool. No control anymore. Then we are separated into groups. After that we build our tent and having lunch. The lunch was like WOW! (mewah gila k?) Proceed to the LDK (latihan dalam kumpulan) activity like Ice breaking and community trees. During that night, we only have 1talk that conducted by JPNIN.


























6th April 2011
-Wake in the morning feeling like P.DIZZY. Not enough sleep! Sleepy to the max! But still have to wake up because this is the IMPORTANT day. First is the aerobic or morning exercise. Simple to the max okay. But its okay, I was looking forward to the activities later.

-First water activity, water confident. Fun and funny to the max! huhuhu! I get the chance to jump 2 times! Yeah! (macam sial gete!) hahahahahaha.. So damn fun! Swim like a pro huh? In your dream la! miakakka...

-Second, snorkeling. Yuhuuu... Super duper best! The funniest part is when I look so confident but actually totally blur! And being left behind by the others..T.T Who says being left behind is a bad thing? For me not really cause I get to see sea turtle! Damn LUCKY! The other group members didn't get to see it, thats mean I'm very lucky! Undeniable!:p the coral ok la. The fish quite a lot but cant touch it! Out of my reach, need to learn scuba diving for that purpose!

-Third, fishing! I've been wanting to go fishing since long time ago. I mean at the sea. If the river level, I'm bored already!hahahaha Manage to get only 1 fish, Kerisi Fish. Okay la tuh~ hahaha.What I'm so happy here is I didn't puke! (cheh, riak gila..tambirang la ko sana...mau kau kana tampiling?hahahha) So still maintain macho. hahaha.

-Lunch time~ Forgot already the the menu.

-Fourth, kayaking! This is my first time kayaking! (eleh, semua pun 1st time ba..kecuali jungle trekking la...) All girls are at the front and I was the only one, I repeat the ONLY ONE girl that kayaking at the back in my group. What the fish?!? (cik esther, ko singaja ka mau tunjuk macho?hahahaha..kuyakkkk) I also tried the rafting, exchange places. It was so scary, I'm afraid I will fall to the sea(macam la teda life jacket kan?mcm budu jak!LOL) Okay la, first time kayaking and it was fun.:D









-Last but not least, the jungle trekking. This one is interesting because we are brought to the past Vietnamese site. History site never fail to amaze me plus the story behind it. But the trek was........ SO RELAX. hahahaha. I feel like the road is only the usual road to go home? Okay that one is exaggerating, but not totally because it feels like my road home. Like 2-3 trips? hahaha. What so memorable is when we rest at a place that have a vine tree. My late grandma often take the water from this vine tree for medication purpose. (I miss you inak!)














-After reached the camp site, I went back to snorkeling again and I was bored already.:p

-Night time, the 'Malam Penghayatan'. So damn ridiculous! I got the ATM machine role k? (tak boleh blah!) But it was quite fun and super MAX FUNNY! Laugh out loud, no insurance.












-Dinner time quite upset with the food.

7th April 2011

-The closing ceremony and going back to USM. Closing ceremony sleepy to the karma level. But have to bear with it since we sit in front the VIP. After that photo session and tidy up places. Going back to the jetty using speed boat that is express to the max! hahaha. Like riding a roller coaster! In our way back, drop by at a petrol station and take our shower. Finally! Then we also stop at Tasik Banding to take some pictures. Reached USM around 12.30am. So tired but still sleep at 3am. (memang buruk perangai!hahaha)














To all that have attended this camp, nice to meet you all. I hope I can see you all again in the future. 3days 2nights is not enough to tighten the friendship bond but I'm glad to know you all. You all are so cool, funny, happy, etc. Although its only short period of time, I still hope the bond will last longer. Until we meet again.:D